Getting to the root of whatever.
I’m going to say this right up front – figuring out where issues come from is neither useful nor productive in all circumstances. If the past is not a healthy place to dwell you are never going to find me insisting you go there. The Ostrich Manoeuvre (sticking your head in the sand) has its merit. It is a survival strategy that allows us to move forward.
That said, reflection can be critical to growth and change.
There are (shocking you all not at all) a few different models for reflective practise but the one that I have used clinically is similar to this one and it can be very effective, and telling, to work though.
Gibbs' reflective cycle
Gibb's reflective cycle is a process involving six steps:
- Description - What happened?
- Feelings - What did you think and feel about it?
- Evaluation - What were the positives and negatives?
- Analysis - What sense can you make of it?
- Conclusion - What else could you have done?
- Action Plan - What will you do next time?
For those of you in the June 2015 AIYH course you will know I modelled challenging oneself and using your toolbox by taking Mr. Neurotic (aka Harri) the horse, to a show. Let me model how this reflective practice would work for that event.
Description: The show was nice and quiet by the time we arrived. Harri loaded and travelled well. He was a little “up” when he heard other horses at first but he stayed calm (relatively speaking), He was easy to tack up and while not as perfect to mount as at home was ok there too. Warmup had a few moments of tension but he was able to work through them. The two tests went well, better than I could have hoped honestly. No errors, no unexpected bobbles.
Feelings: I enjoyed the experience (somewhat to my shock) . I wasn’t particularly nervous but was prepared to scratch from the classes at any time. I knew I had to be prepared to adapt from plan A to plan B and in fact ended up doing a plan C for one test. My overarching feeling was one of adventure.
Evaluation: For what it was, a test of a moment in time and a challenge, it was a great day. Would I have been happier with better scores and if I have been able to stick to plan A? Probably, but I was pleased with so much. Mr N’s first show with me, my first time trailering alone in my life. Compliments from spectators, Dealing with a "coven" comment with a laugh not defensiveness. I need a new jacket before I show again – or to try to repair mine.
Analysis: Mr N is ready to slowly add some stress back into his program to learn to cope. I can expect more from him and offer him more concrete support. He can deal with challenges now and the trust we share is quite palpable.
Conclusion: Positive experience for us both. What a long way he has come.
Action Plan: get off property when I can and repeat the show experience at the end of August. (Lots more detail obviously needed – but somehow I suspect planning with be an ongoing topic!)
Being reflective gives us a way to move forward. If there is something you are struggling to let go, or make sense of try some reflection around it. (I can help – just ask!) Reflection can be done on paper all at once or just niggled away at. Both are effective. The goal of reflection is not to cause yourself stress so if all you can think of is “I BLEW IT” don’t get too reflective yet. Start identifying the positive and then allow a little reflection to begin.
The Connection to Mindfulness
Reflective practice is a corner stone of mindfulness. It can calm your mind to lead you to meditation. It is an action of awareness that is central to mindful practice. It can be used in the place of meditation if meditation is not possible for you at a given moment in time.
These questions are about career but you are all smart enough to adapt them to what you need. (http://mindfuluniverse.com/profiles/blogs/10-questions-for-inner-reflection-to-move-with-ease-in-your-caree in case you want to cut and paste)
No shock here - if you want homework assigned - take something from the past (yes yesterday counts) and apply reflective practice in whatever format you would like to it. Do you practice positive reflection now? Should you? Is it a skill you need to build? Add to your toolbox? Why or why not?